by Slate Quicksilver
You may disagree with who is number 1 or number 4, but you can't disagree that this season is going to be either super crazy awesome or terribly depressing.
(1) Florida sleepwalked through Starkville to beat Mississippi State. Yes, Florida only won by 10, but consider this: Florida had 4 trips into the redzone. One was a missed FG, one was a FG, one was a TD and one was a 100 yard long pick 6. This says two things: UF's redzone offense is confuzzled and this game should have been a blowout and a half. Subtract 7 from the Bulldogs, throw up 18 points and you would have had a disemboweling. But football is not a "would have" game. As a result Florida is still in a fog and they may not be so lucky down the road.
(2) Alabama's offense, like Florida's, is in trouble. Tennessee played a great defensive gameplan and barring their kicking game completely tanking, the Vols would have won. But again, football is not a "would have" game. Alabama's defense continues is smothering of all opponents, but like Florida, their offense is not something to be proud of.
In lighter news (3) Texas embarrassed Missouri at home. I think that this is the final blow in the Mizzou hope train that started in 2007 when they were at one point #1 (and Kansas was like #5). It's a tough and unpleasant path back to mediocrity, Mizzou, but you had a good run while it lasted. The Longhorns Offense looked good again, but it was the defense that opened eyes. A Texas team with a little defense is a scary idea.
(4) Boise State continued its march to an undefeated season and thus blood raining from the skies in December. Hawai'i is back to mediocrity now that the June Jones effect pulled up its stakes and is at SMU... who is probably going to make a bowl game. It should be noted that Boise State in the BCS championship game with be the end of the terrible tyranny of the system, but note that in order get rid of it, we must effectively allow the system to shit the bed. This year shitting the bed would be a doomsday scenario of Boise State-Cincy playing in championship game.
Raise your hand if you thought (5) Cincinnati would still be undefeated in late October. (Raises his hand) Cincy is a good team. No doubts there. Are they the number 5 team in the country? Probably not. Is Boise State the 4th best team in the country? Definitely not. Yet here we are. The Bearcats obliterated Loovil moving them closer to an undefeated season.
While we are on nightmare undefeateds, let's talk about (6) Iowa winning their second game on the last play of the game in the most improbable of circumstances. Give Michigan State credit, they played a great defensive game and that hook and ladder at the end of the game to set up the "supposed to be" winning TD was a decision made with balls of a titanium-osmium alloy. But seriously, Iowa was bailed out on a few bad calls and MSU inexplicably blitzing 7(!) on their own seven yard line with 3 seconds left. I applaud not going to the prevent defense, but seriously, a SEVEN BLITZ!?!? The cornerback stood no chance.
So here we are. We could have 6 unbeatens at the end of the season: UF/Bama, Iowa, Boise State, Texas and TCU. 6 teams, only 2 slots in the NC game, what could solve this? Oh... A PLAYOFF!
The rest of the Top 25:
(7) USC survived Oregon State, but by the well tanned skins of their teeth. Listen, USC is in a down year. There is no way a logical person could argue otherwise. They always have an excuse for their in conference losses, but they lost to Washington and this time Oregon State was a long play away from beating them.
(8) TCU bravely walked into Mormon land and soundly crushed (16) BYU. This game was never really close and TCU's only resistance on the way out is Utah in a few weeks. The BCS is in trouble... don't know if you got that just yet.
(9) LSU handed Auburn another loss to continue Auburn course correction back to being .500. LSU, if they can beat Alabama in 2 weeks becomes the driver in the SEC West car. If LSU beats Alabama, they will go to the SEC Championship game and if they beat Gators. Hello, NC game.
Clemson walked down to (10) Miami and won in overtime. Clemson, it has been determined, is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you'll get. Sometimes they'll knock off a top 10 team on the road and next week they may lose at home to Coastal Carolina. Miami is similar yet they are hinged on what Jacory Harris wears to the game. Gucci, win. Versace, close win. Ferragamo, HA! You can buy that at a department store. Definite loss.
(11) Oregon demolished Washington, reminding UW that beating USC was a product of their own inconsistency and how USC is terribly overrated.
(12) Georgia Tech beat Virginia during Virginia's annual "Biblical Flood Re-creation Day." Seriously, the 8 bit RAYCOM sports feed had this game looking like it was a night game, except that the game was played at high noon.
(13) Penn State went to Ann Arbor, took Michigan behind a shed, told them to cut them a stick and then whacked them for 4 straight hours. Michigan provided endless comedy with their self caused safety. The center snapped the ball in the shotgun in their own endzone not over Tate Forcier's head, but to this side. The ball of course zoomed out of the back of the endzone. Before the ball even hit the ground, the center turned around to Tate Forcier and started berating him. Forcier curled into the fetal position and began to sob. Penn State got the ball back and immediately threw a 60 yard TD pass. (Full disclosure: Only one of those things were fake).
(15) Oklahoma State destroyed Baylor who honestly deserved it. Did you see those uniforms? Yeah, they deserved it.
(17) Houston took care of SMU. They needed a big in conference win to prove that they aren't just another small conference team who shouldn't be ranked this high and are only ranked this high because they beat a big time team or two yet they still lost an in-conference game and now must beat everyone by 458679 just to look good. That almost made sense.
It took overtime, but (18) Utah took out Air Force. Unpatriotic. Why does Utah hate America?
(19) Ohio State finally had a good game again a conference opponent. The Terrelle Pryor Overrated Watch Sponsored by Green Day has been slightly upgraded from "Kate Hudson" to "Capri Sun Juices." Pryor ran 15 times, had barely a 50% completion percentage and still threw a pick against a woeful Minnesota defense. It's funny that only now did people in Columbus start questioning the Sweatervest. Forget the big game failures... it was a loss to Purdue that did it. Not unlike what happened to Ron Zook at Florida... a loss at Mississippi State was the death knell.
(20) Pitt continues the trend of building up their hopes only to be dashed because their coach is Dave Wannstadt. Also, the USF annual slide is hitting on all cylinders.
(22) Arizona turned the ball over 5 times, but they still beat UCLA in the standard Pac-10 default score of 27-13.
(23) West Virginia showed a remarkable amount of class in honoring UCONN's fallen teammate before the game. Well played West Virginia. And then they quietly and politely disposed of UCONN in a close game.
(24) South Carolina nearly lost again to Vandy. When Spurrier was at Florida, it was a yearly event. Spurrier would double whatever Vandy would get total by the first half. Then last year he lost and this year he barely beat them. I think he is going to leave the Gamecocks. Honestly. They won't fire him, he will just not show up for work for a day... or 50.
Did you ever think you'd see the day where (25) Kansas would be ranked and Oklahoma would not be and they would play? I sure didn't. But if it ever did happen, I would have guessed that Oklahoma win the game in that weird scenario 35-10. I was wrong. OU won 35-13.
The rest of everything:
Don't ask how, but Florida State beat UNC. Don't ask how, but DUKE BEAT MARYLAND (LOLZ!) Notre Dame finally beat Boston College. Navy beat Wake... USA USA USA. Iowa State beat Nebraska in a laugher 9-7. Colorado continues its quest to fire Dan Hawkins by losing to Kansas State. Texas A&M shocked every human being alive by brutally crushing TTech... the line from Vegas was TTech -21.5 and the difference was 22 point so when I looked in my pick'em league, I thought I had won because I took the Red Raiders. Rutgers soundly beat Army (boooo!). Syracuse beat Akron in a game that was way closer than it should have been. Northwestern was down by 25 at one point, but luckily they were playing Indiana. In a terrible game that ESPN gave to Pam Ward to cover (snoozefest), Purdue beat Illinois. Cal will be ranked next week as they blew up Washington State. Stanford is now a game away from a bowl while Arizona State is now a loss or two away from firing Dennis Erickson. Kentucky destroyed Louisiana-Monroe. Finally, The Nutt Bowl (or the Giggity Bowl) ended with Ole Miss beating Arkansas as edsbs.com said: "eleventy to tangerine."
Some changes here coming down the pipes tomorrow.
Showing posts with label everything you needed to know. Show all posts
Showing posts with label everything you needed to know. Show all posts
Sunday, October 25, 2009
Sunday, October 18, 2009
Final Word for College Football Week 7
By Slate Quicksilver
Big games in the college ranks this week. Some teams rolled, others got rolled. The top 10 saw 2 teams fall and 4 teams dodge bullets. College football is certainly in full swing now.
(1) Florida sleepwalked through Arkansas and barely survived. It is true that Arkansas missed 2 FGs (UF missed one) and really Florida's defense is the sole reason they won this game. A hyper-conservative offense and 4 FUMBLES were big contributors in the Razorback upset bid. Credit the Hogs for getting to Tebow all day, but credit the Gators for learning from last year's Ole Miss debacle and not abandoning the run. Florida has fallen to #2 (no shocker...) but it isn't like Alabama crushed South Carolina...
In fact if you took away (2) Alabama's early pick 6, South Carolina was in striking distance for the entire game. The Tide's offense carried solely by Mark Ingram's decision to bulldoze any and all people who opposed him... he rushed for 246 yards on only 24 carries! Stephen Garcia was his normal erratic self, going 20/46 with that pick six, but he played admirably. It was the Gamecocks lack of running the ball to get important first downs that killed them.
If you are keeping score at home, Alabama has allowed 24, 14, 7, 7, 20, 3 and 6 points this year. Florida has allowed 3, 6, 13, 7, 3 and 20 point this year. If both teams play in the SEC Championship game and if both teams' offensive and defensive trends stay the same (mediocre offenses, pants-soiling causing defenses) the SECCG will be an 8-6 defense-fest.
(3) Texas nearly got clipped by (20) Oklahoma despite re-killing Sam Bradford early. 8 turnovers really muddied this game and Colt McCoy didn't go nuts as expected. The biggest stat was OU's complete embarrassment of a running game. They had a grand total of -16 rushing yards. This forced OU backup Landry Jones to try to pass his way to the victory. That did not happen. (Side note: Colt McCoy vs. Landry Jones is probably the best matchup of QB names the BigXII has ever seen. Colt McCoy... good Texas name. Landry Jones... Tom Landry + Jerry Jones!?!?! If those aren't perfect names for BigXII powerhouse teams' QBs... I don't know what is.)
(4) Virginia Tech got smacked down by (19) Georgia Tech in Hotlanta. Tyrod Taylor was not horrible and neither was the Va Tech running game. But GT's triple option went bananas rushing for 309 yards. VT D-coordinator Bud Foster's head exploded after the game destroying all buildings within a .75 mile radius. GT, channeling their inner 1940s stat line, threw a total of 7 times. It really has to be noted that other than Miami, GT's offense has run everyone over this year stopping only to clear dead bodies out of the wheels wells on occasion.
(5) Boise State on Wednesday(?) held on to stave off a late charge by Tulsa. It is at this point that we, as a people, must come to the realization that BSU is going to coast to an undefeated season. Yes, we talked about the potential of this doomsday scenario at the beginning of the year, but we thought that surely Oregon would take care of them (stupid Ducks) and that maybe either Fresno State or Tulsa could trip them. They now have a straight and undisturbed torpedo run on an undefeated season lined up. Will this finally be the year that a team like Boise State crashes the championship game? We know between Florida and Alabama there will be a loss and Texas is not in the clear just yet. This is going to be an interesting second half of the year.
Rest of the Top 25:
(6) USC did not obliterate (25) Notre Dame as 97% of the country had hoped. Credit Front Butt with cooking up a good offensive game plan and not eating it before the band finished the national anthem. This killed the Irish's last gasp at getting to a BCS game and may have sealed Front Butt's pink slip. This also raises questions about USC, who supposedly a team made of world-beaters and ninja robot assassins. This site makes no bones about it. ND is VERY OVERRATED due to several games they SHOULD HAVE LOST BUT DIDN'T DUE TO RIDICULOUS CIRCUMSTANCES. USC should have brutalized them, but couldn't. This suggests that it may be a down year in Trojanland.
(7) Ohio State finally lost an in-conference game to... BWAHAHAHAHA... Purdue. 5 turnovers slit the Buckeye's wrists and Purdue's place kicker might have made himself a nice paycheck in the NFL making a 55 yarder and went 4/5 to seal the day. The Terrelle Pryor Overrated Watch is being raised 2 levels this week from "people are starting to make pamphlets stating the theoretical case that he could be overrated" to "Kate Hudson". He skipped "The Toughness of an Actual Caribbean Pirate Circa 1700" thanks to the loss. By the way, Ohio State does not require an independent "Overrated Watch" because "Ohio State" is already a level in the TPOW and it is just about as high as you can go.
As expected (8) Cincy beat down (21) USF, who folded like a lawn chair in the second half. Cincy, like Boise State, has a great chance of going undefeated.
(9) Miami was a bit slow to get started, but Jacory Harris found his shiny shoes and kick started the flyness-train. UCF put a fight, but no one beats Jacory Harris when he puts on his shiny shoes.
(11) Iowa continues its trend of being undefeated yet not winning any game convincingly by outlasting WisCANsin.
(12) TCU pillaged Colorado State. Next week TCU gets BYU. That will be some non-power conference football to watch.
(14) Penn State unplugged Minnesota by completely shutting them out. It snowed in Happy Valley on Saturday. For a Floridian who moved to Michigan not long ago, this is terrifying because it is mid-October.
TTech walked into (15) Nebraska's house and managed to pull off a victory. TTech is now ranked, whereas Nebraska takes the loss and drops from the top 25. Worse still, the BigXII north is going to be an ocean of mehness. K-State is 2-1 and in first place. Bill Snyder will not die.
(16) OK State blew up Mizzou, who left their offense in the locker room after halftime.
Despite having to deal with a mega hissy fit from his son and the hell he will catch from the ol' ball 'n' chain, Dan Hawkins sat his son in favor of the backup QB due to poor play. The result? Unranked Colorado ends the (17) Kansas hope train. Why is it that whenever Colorado beats anyone who is ranked when they are not, they rush the field? Seriously. You beat a terrible team undeserving of their rank. This does not equal taking down a #1 team in the nation.
(18) BYU got it's 500th win as a program over San Diego State. This has to feel good for the Stormin' Mormons, but remember that a good deal of those victories were against teams like: San Diego State.
(23) Houston smoked Tulane after a slow first half.
(24) Utah was not to be outdone by arch-rival BYU getting their 500th victory, so they got their 600th win as a program over UNLV. This has to feel good for the non-Mormons in Utah, but remember that a good deal of those victories were against teams like: UNLV.
The rest of everyone:
Clemson ran over Wake. BC exploded on NC State who is going in the wrong direction. Virginia's course correction continued over Maryland. Iowa State won their first BigXII game in like 234 years over Baylor. Kansas State nuked Texas A&M. The Wannstaches are 6-1 (good for Pitt) after beating Rutgers. UCONN soundly beat Louisville, Steve Kragthorpe is not going to be there much longer. West Virginia seemed to take it easy on Marshall. Sparty showed up late for homecoming against Northwestern (a noon game and to be fair MSU is a party school...) but took care of business. Michigan feels like a big man right now after totally beating up D2 Delaware State. The Fighting Zookers lost to Indiana in a game that would have put even meth-heads to sleep. Army lost to Temple (Temple... we're at war and clearly you are on the terrorist side). Navy survived a fight with a rapidly improving SMU. Cal took of business over UCLA. Arizona let Washington off the hook last week with two late TDs, so this week Stadford extended the Wildcats with the same courtesy. Arizona State struck gold late to beat Washington. Georgia stomped on Vandy. Mississippi State beat Middle Tennessee State. Ole Miss killed UAB to try get their offense oriented in the correct direction. And finally we here at PLS would like to salute Kentucky for beating Auburn for the first time since 1966.
Big games in the college ranks this week. Some teams rolled, others got rolled. The top 10 saw 2 teams fall and 4 teams dodge bullets. College football is certainly in full swing now.
(1) Florida sleepwalked through Arkansas and barely survived. It is true that Arkansas missed 2 FGs (UF missed one) and really Florida's defense is the sole reason they won this game. A hyper-conservative offense and 4 FUMBLES were big contributors in the Razorback upset bid. Credit the Hogs for getting to Tebow all day, but credit the Gators for learning from last year's Ole Miss debacle and not abandoning the run. Florida has fallen to #2 (no shocker...) but it isn't like Alabama crushed South Carolina...
In fact if you took away (2) Alabama's early pick 6, South Carolina was in striking distance for the entire game. The Tide's offense carried solely by Mark Ingram's decision to bulldoze any and all people who opposed him... he rushed for 246 yards on only 24 carries! Stephen Garcia was his normal erratic self, going 20/46 with that pick six, but he played admirably. It was the Gamecocks lack of running the ball to get important first downs that killed them.
If you are keeping score at home, Alabama has allowed 24, 14, 7, 7, 20, 3 and 6 points this year. Florida has allowed 3, 6, 13, 7, 3 and 20 point this year. If both teams play in the SEC Championship game and if both teams' offensive and defensive trends stay the same (mediocre offenses, pants-soiling causing defenses) the SECCG will be an 8-6 defense-fest.
(3) Texas nearly got clipped by (20) Oklahoma despite re-killing Sam Bradford early. 8 turnovers really muddied this game and Colt McCoy didn't go nuts as expected. The biggest stat was OU's complete embarrassment of a running game. They had a grand total of -16 rushing yards. This forced OU backup Landry Jones to try to pass his way to the victory. That did not happen. (Side note: Colt McCoy vs. Landry Jones is probably the best matchup of QB names the BigXII has ever seen. Colt McCoy... good Texas name. Landry Jones... Tom Landry + Jerry Jones!?!?! If those aren't perfect names for BigXII powerhouse teams' QBs... I don't know what is.)
(4) Virginia Tech got smacked down by (19) Georgia Tech in Hotlanta. Tyrod Taylor was not horrible and neither was the Va Tech running game. But GT's triple option went bananas rushing for 309 yards. VT D-coordinator Bud Foster's head exploded after the game destroying all buildings within a .75 mile radius. GT, channeling their inner 1940s stat line, threw a total of 7 times. It really has to be noted that other than Miami, GT's offense has run everyone over this year stopping only to clear dead bodies out of the wheels wells on occasion.
(5) Boise State on Wednesday(?) held on to stave off a late charge by Tulsa. It is at this point that we, as a people, must come to the realization that BSU is going to coast to an undefeated season. Yes, we talked about the potential of this doomsday scenario at the beginning of the year, but we thought that surely Oregon would take care of them (stupid Ducks) and that maybe either Fresno State or Tulsa could trip them. They now have a straight and undisturbed torpedo run on an undefeated season lined up. Will this finally be the year that a team like Boise State crashes the championship game? We know between Florida and Alabama there will be a loss and Texas is not in the clear just yet. This is going to be an interesting second half of the year.
Rest of the Top 25:
(6) USC did not obliterate (25) Notre Dame as 97% of the country had hoped. Credit Front Butt with cooking up a good offensive game plan and not eating it before the band finished the national anthem. This killed the Irish's last gasp at getting to a BCS game and may have sealed Front Butt's pink slip. This also raises questions about USC, who supposedly a team made of world-beaters and ninja robot assassins. This site makes no bones about it. ND is VERY OVERRATED due to several games they SHOULD HAVE LOST BUT DIDN'T DUE TO RIDICULOUS CIRCUMSTANCES. USC should have brutalized them, but couldn't. This suggests that it may be a down year in Trojanland.
(7) Ohio State finally lost an in-conference game to... BWAHAHAHAHA... Purdue. 5 turnovers slit the Buckeye's wrists and Purdue's place kicker might have made himself a nice paycheck in the NFL making a 55 yarder and went 4/5 to seal the day. The Terrelle Pryor Overrated Watch is being raised 2 levels this week from "people are starting to make pamphlets stating the theoretical case that he could be overrated" to "Kate Hudson". He skipped "The Toughness of an Actual Caribbean Pirate Circa 1700" thanks to the loss. By the way, Ohio State does not require an independent "Overrated Watch" because "Ohio State" is already a level in the TPOW and it is just about as high as you can go.
As expected (8) Cincy beat down (21) USF, who folded like a lawn chair in the second half. Cincy, like Boise State, has a great chance of going undefeated.
(9) Miami was a bit slow to get started, but Jacory Harris found his shiny shoes and kick started the flyness-train. UCF put a fight, but no one beats Jacory Harris when he puts on his shiny shoes.
(11) Iowa continues its trend of being undefeated yet not winning any game convincingly by outlasting WisCANsin.
(12) TCU pillaged Colorado State. Next week TCU gets BYU. That will be some non-power conference football to watch.
(14) Penn State unplugged Minnesota by completely shutting them out. It snowed in Happy Valley on Saturday. For a Floridian who moved to Michigan not long ago, this is terrifying because it is mid-October.
TTech walked into (15) Nebraska's house and managed to pull off a victory. TTech is now ranked, whereas Nebraska takes the loss and drops from the top 25. Worse still, the BigXII north is going to be an ocean of mehness. K-State is 2-1 and in first place. Bill Snyder will not die.
(16) OK State blew up Mizzou, who left their offense in the locker room after halftime.
Despite having to deal with a mega hissy fit from his son and the hell he will catch from the ol' ball 'n' chain, Dan Hawkins sat his son in favor of the backup QB due to poor play. The result? Unranked Colorado ends the (17) Kansas hope train. Why is it that whenever Colorado beats anyone who is ranked when they are not, they rush the field? Seriously. You beat a terrible team undeserving of their rank. This does not equal taking down a #1 team in the nation.
(18) BYU got it's 500th win as a program over San Diego State. This has to feel good for the Stormin' Mormons, but remember that a good deal of those victories were against teams like: San Diego State.
(23) Houston smoked Tulane after a slow first half.
(24) Utah was not to be outdone by arch-rival BYU getting their 500th victory, so they got their 600th win as a program over UNLV. This has to feel good for the non-Mormons in Utah, but remember that a good deal of those victories were against teams like: UNLV.
The rest of everyone:
Clemson ran over Wake. BC exploded on NC State who is going in the wrong direction. Virginia's course correction continued over Maryland. Iowa State won their first BigXII game in like 234 years over Baylor. Kansas State nuked Texas A&M. The Wannstaches are 6-1 (good for Pitt) after beating Rutgers. UCONN soundly beat Louisville, Steve Kragthorpe is not going to be there much longer. West Virginia seemed to take it easy on Marshall. Sparty showed up late for homecoming against Northwestern (a noon game and to be fair MSU is a party school...) but took care of business. Michigan feels like a big man right now after totally beating up D2 Delaware State. The Fighting Zookers lost to Indiana in a game that would have put even meth-heads to sleep. Army lost to Temple (Temple... we're at war and clearly you are on the terrorist side). Navy survived a fight with a rapidly improving SMU. Cal took of business over UCLA. Arizona let Washington off the hook last week with two late TDs, so this week Stadford extended the Wildcats with the same courtesy. Arizona State struck gold late to beat Washington. Georgia stomped on Vandy. Mississippi State beat Middle Tennessee State. Ole Miss killed UAB to try get their offense oriented in the correct direction. And finally we here at PLS would like to salute Kentucky for beating Auburn for the first time since 1966.
Sunday, October 11, 2009
Final Word for College Football Week 6
Here's your weekly college football rundown for teams that matter in case you missed something here or there:
(1) Florida walked into Tiger Stadium and dismantled (4) LSU's offense. Completely and totally. LSU's offense could not move the ball when they needed to as the Gator D-line was a permanent fixture in the Tiger backfield. Florida had more than 3 times more plays on their opponents side of the field. 13-3 was the final, but it easily could have been much higher. A missed FG, a decision to not take an easy FG and a Rush Limbaugh-esque conservative offensive gameplan limited the scoring. Remember, UF outgained LSU's total yards more than 2 to 1. Frankly, UF played a perfect game because they preserved Tebow's health, they dominated LSU at the point of attack and they crushed the Tiger offense on all but one drive.
(2) Texas toyed with their prey from Colorado. Colorado even had the lead for a while, but Texas eventually decided to wake up, brush their teeth, have a light and nutritious breakfast and then murder in cold blood Colorado with a pair of lopping shears in the second half.
(3) Alabama embarrassed (20) Ole Miss in Oxford. Something must be mentioned about Alabama's terrifying defense. Yes, Ole Miss's Offense was transparent. Jevan Snead had a Casey Dick with Houston Nutt coaching-like stat line of 11/34 140 yards with 0 TDs and 4 INTs. But this is what you get with Nutt at the helm. I predicted an Ole Miss win, but I wasn't shocked to see their offense decide to not leave the locker room. Frankly, I was impressed with the Rebs defense, because this game should have been a 40 point blow out.
(5) Virginia Tech looked fabulous against BC. BC finally got a touchdown, but by then they were already down by 34 points. Their second TD was in severe garbage time. For Va Tech, they didn't have to force Tyrod Taylor to win the game, he played reasonably well and so the Hokies played a good game wherein they looked good.
(9) Ohio State looked terrible but still won over previously undefeated WisCANsin. The Terrelle Pryor Overrated Watch has been raised from "rubbing one's facial hair while taking a deep breath" to "people are starting to make pamphlets stating the theoretical case that he could be overrated." Seriously. In a 31-13 rout, OSU won on a kickoff return, a pick six and two missed FGs. WisCANsin should have won as Ohio State had 184 YARDS OF TOTAL OFFENSE! Terrelle Pryor made his case for the Badger's MVP by going 5/13 for 87 yards with a TD and an INT.
Rest of the Top 25:
(10) TCU did the usual non-BCS powerhouse thing and had trouble with an average-at best in conference opponent.
(11) Miami obliterated FAMU with long play after long play.
(12) Iowa beat a still overrated Michigan (yes, they aren't ranked but they are still overrated) team that wound up pulling out wunderkid Tate Forcier for the shoe knowledge challenged wunderkid Denard Robinson. It didn't matter much as Corn survived a late push.
(13) Oregon had a little bit of trouble with UCLA. Quick note on UCLA: Their offense is miserable.
(14) Penn State ran over Eastern Illinois with a semi truck, backed it up over them, ran over them again and then parked over them.
(15) Oklahoma State had considered trouble with Texas A&M. Dez Bryant was ineligible and injuries were hurting them, but Okie Doke St. should have crushed this TAMU team that is not that good.
(16) Kansas needed to pass for 1000 yards to beat Iowa State, who appears to be better than most expected. Note: The expectations they are better than could be summed up as: "We expect them to at least show up, on time, for each game."
Arkansas beat (17) Auburn in a battle between two teams that run their own brands of a high flying spread offense variant. This is only worth a mention because thirty years ago they may have only combined for 10 passes due to two offenses that were as power-run centric as they came.
(18) BYU crushed UNLV. Isn't it funny that the Mormons from BYU almost always have to travel to Sin City every year without fail? I wonder if they have to stay in isolation chambers carried in by semi trucks from Provo.
Sam Bradford returned for (19) Oklahoma to pass for almost 400 yards on Baylor. The Bears certainly put up more fight than some thought (I thought the UN would need a binding resolution to end the game early) and OU scoring only 33 points is a rather subdued event. Next week will be fun.
On Thursday (21) Nebraska won at (24) Mizzou in what can only be described as "What a football game would have looked like during the Biblical flood." Mizzou was overrated, we knew that, but it proved that their version of the spread can't work in the rain. You need to be able to have a reliable running game if you run the pure spread (see: Florida, Oregon).
(22) Georgia Tech may have finally be the one to put the sword through FSU and Bobby Bowden's heart. FSU's offense was very good, but their defense looked confused, tired and routinely decided they were morally opposed to tackling.
(25) South Carolina escaped a loss to Kentucky thanks to a failed 2 point conversion late in the 4th.
The rest of everything:
UNC got 6 TOs from Georgia Southern. Virginia set Indiana on fire and walked away like they in the movies. Duke is halfway to a bowl... NC St. is still halfway to a bowl. Riley Skinner keeps his NFL dreams alive (thus preventing him from his destiny in gay porn) by leading Wake over Maryland on his own. Texas Tech may have found their new QB, Steven Sheffield, who passed for 7 TDs on K-State (he was even pulled in the 4th before another TD pass). West Virginia continues Greg Paulus's woes as Syracuse's QB. Rutgers silently is now 4-1. The Wannstaches beat UCONN thanks to a late rally. Louisville is still terrible but they beat Southern Miss. Northwestern beat down Miami (OH). Minnesota cruised past Purdue. Sparty ran over Illinois... only now are people questioning if the Zooker is on the hot seat. Washington State beat Ariz... yeah right... Arizona State handled Wazzu. Oregon State's offense looked good against Stanford. Washington stormed back to beat Arizona. Vandy got embarrassed by Army, but good for the Cadets, they deserve to win (halfway to a bowl...). Miss. St. kept it close with Houston but couldn't pull off the win. Finally, Tennessee obliterated Georgia, which is completely embarrassing for UGA and gives a good deal of false hope to Tennessee. That is always good for someone who hates both of them.
(1) Florida walked into Tiger Stadium and dismantled (4) LSU's offense. Completely and totally. LSU's offense could not move the ball when they needed to as the Gator D-line was a permanent fixture in the Tiger backfield. Florida had more than 3 times more plays on their opponents side of the field. 13-3 was the final, but it easily could have been much higher. A missed FG, a decision to not take an easy FG and a Rush Limbaugh-esque conservative offensive gameplan limited the scoring. Remember, UF outgained LSU's total yards more than 2 to 1. Frankly, UF played a perfect game because they preserved Tebow's health, they dominated LSU at the point of attack and they crushed the Tiger offense on all but one drive.
(2) Texas toyed with their prey from Colorado. Colorado even had the lead for a while, but Texas eventually decided to wake up, brush their teeth, have a light and nutritious breakfast and then murder in cold blood Colorado with a pair of lopping shears in the second half.
(3) Alabama embarrassed (20) Ole Miss in Oxford. Something must be mentioned about Alabama's terrifying defense. Yes, Ole Miss's Offense was transparent. Jevan Snead had a Casey Dick with Houston Nutt coaching-like stat line of 11/34 140 yards with 0 TDs and 4 INTs. But this is what you get with Nutt at the helm. I predicted an Ole Miss win, but I wasn't shocked to see their offense decide to not leave the locker room. Frankly, I was impressed with the Rebs defense, because this game should have been a 40 point blow out.
(5) Virginia Tech looked fabulous against BC. BC finally got a touchdown, but by then they were already down by 34 points. Their second TD was in severe garbage time. For Va Tech, they didn't have to force Tyrod Taylor to win the game, he played reasonably well and so the Hokies played a good game wherein they looked good.
(9) Ohio State looked terrible but still won over previously undefeated WisCANsin. The Terrelle Pryor Overrated Watch has been raised from "rubbing one's facial hair while taking a deep breath" to "people are starting to make pamphlets stating the theoretical case that he could be overrated." Seriously. In a 31-13 rout, OSU won on a kickoff return, a pick six and two missed FGs. WisCANsin should have won as Ohio State had 184 YARDS OF TOTAL OFFENSE! Terrelle Pryor made his case for the Badger's MVP by going 5/13 for 87 yards with a TD and an INT.
Rest of the Top 25:
(10) TCU did the usual non-BCS powerhouse thing and had trouble with an average-at best in conference opponent.
(11) Miami obliterated FAMU with long play after long play.
(12) Iowa beat a still overrated Michigan (yes, they aren't ranked but they are still overrated) team that wound up pulling out wunderkid Tate Forcier for the shoe knowledge challenged wunderkid Denard Robinson. It didn't matter much as Corn survived a late push.
(13) Oregon had a little bit of trouble with UCLA. Quick note on UCLA: Their offense is miserable.
(14) Penn State ran over Eastern Illinois with a semi truck, backed it up over them, ran over them again and then parked over them.
(15) Oklahoma State had considered trouble with Texas A&M. Dez Bryant was ineligible and injuries were hurting them, but Okie Doke St. should have crushed this TAMU team that is not that good.
(16) Kansas needed to pass for 1000 yards to beat Iowa State, who appears to be better than most expected. Note: The expectations they are better than could be summed up as: "We expect them to at least show up, on time, for each game."
Arkansas beat (17) Auburn in a battle between two teams that run their own brands of a high flying spread offense variant. This is only worth a mention because thirty years ago they may have only combined for 10 passes due to two offenses that were as power-run centric as they came.
(18) BYU crushed UNLV. Isn't it funny that the Mormons from BYU almost always have to travel to Sin City every year without fail? I wonder if they have to stay in isolation chambers carried in by semi trucks from Provo.
Sam Bradford returned for (19) Oklahoma to pass for almost 400 yards on Baylor. The Bears certainly put up more fight than some thought (I thought the UN would need a binding resolution to end the game early) and OU scoring only 33 points is a rather subdued event. Next week will be fun.
On Thursday (21) Nebraska won at (24) Mizzou in what can only be described as "What a football game would have looked like during the Biblical flood." Mizzou was overrated, we knew that, but it proved that their version of the spread can't work in the rain. You need to be able to have a reliable running game if you run the pure spread (see: Florida, Oregon).
(22) Georgia Tech may have finally be the one to put the sword through FSU and Bobby Bowden's heart. FSU's offense was very good, but their defense looked confused, tired and routinely decided they were morally opposed to tackling.
(25) South Carolina escaped a loss to Kentucky thanks to a failed 2 point conversion late in the 4th.
The rest of everything:
UNC got 6 TOs from Georgia Southern. Virginia set Indiana on fire and walked away like they in the movies. Duke is halfway to a bowl... NC St. is still halfway to a bowl. Riley Skinner keeps his NFL dreams alive (thus preventing him from his destiny in gay porn) by leading Wake over Maryland on his own. Texas Tech may have found their new QB, Steven Sheffield, who passed for 7 TDs on K-State (he was even pulled in the 4th before another TD pass). West Virginia continues Greg Paulus's woes as Syracuse's QB. Rutgers silently is now 4-1. The Wannstaches beat UCONN thanks to a late rally. Louisville is still terrible but they beat Southern Miss. Northwestern beat down Miami (OH). Minnesota cruised past Purdue. Sparty ran over Illinois... only now are people questioning if the Zooker is on the hot seat. Washington State beat Ariz... yeah right... Arizona State handled Wazzu. Oregon State's offense looked good against Stanford. Washington stormed back to beat Arizona. Vandy got embarrassed by Army, but good for the Cadets, they deserve to win (halfway to a bowl...). Miss. St. kept it close with Houston but couldn't pull off the win. Finally, Tennessee obliterated Georgia, which is completely embarrassing for UGA and gives a good deal of false hope to Tennessee. That is always good for someone who hates both of them.
Sunday, October 4, 2009
Final Word for College Football Week 5
By Slate Quicksilver
Here's your weekly college football rundown for teams that matter in case you missed something here or there:
(1) Florida and (2) beat their respective byes by a total of 639 points. Critics claim they were running up the score.
(3) Alabama had issues at Kentucky in the first half, but scoring 2 TDs in 19 seconds before the half opened that game up very quickly. Kentucky has no QB. At all. 'Bama, on the other hand, looks very strong and very deserving of being a top 5 team.
(4) LSU went between hedges to (18) Georgia and pulled a miracle out of thin air. 3 TDs were exchanged in the last 3 minutes of the game with LSU scoring the last one. You have to wonder if the Tigers were looking ahead to next week's battle with UF. On Georgia's end, their running game clearly has not found a replacement for Knowshon Moreno despite getting their O-line nice and healthy.
(5) Boise State did not meet the expectations everyone had against UC Davis. UC Davis is a D2 school, Boise State is supposedly one of the few true powerhouses in a non BCS conference. Yes, they won and maybe UC Davis is good, but the #5 country in the nation should NEVER have issues with a D2 school even if it is the former D2 national champion. Right, Michigan?
(6) Virginia Tech continues our disappointment trend with their 8 point win against Duke. Yes, a win is nice. But Duke should never come with 20 points of a D1 school. Tyrod Taylor looked miserable and their Defense let up several long plays to white nerdy Duke receivers. That was both funny and a let down for the #6 team.
(7) USC ran over (24) Cal. I guess it didn't matter that Cal lost last week to an Oregon team that was wielding a battle axe and a kite shield. Even if Cal won, USC probably still would have pantsed them at home in front all of their friends and family. Jahvid Best had 47 yards on 13 carries. Not good for the best RB in the nation if you ask me.
Rest of the top 25:
(8) Oklahoma had (17) Miami on the ropes early, but Miami ratcheted up their D and Landry Jones (an awesome name for a QB in the Big XII... with an awesome mustache by the way) couldn't lead the comeback. Da U went 3-1 through their death-run/blood gauntlet which is very much worth a pat on the back, an "attaboy!" and a beer.
(9) Ohio State beat Indiana in unspectacular and boring fashion. The Terrelle Pryor Overrated Watch has been raised from "one eyebrow raised" to "rubbing one's facial hair while taking a deep breath."
At one time (10) Cincy was only up 23-13 to Miami (OH), but they realized their offense wasn't plugged in properly for the first three quarters.
(11) TCU dismantled SMU with no one being surprised.
(12) Houston took on the real markings of a C-USA team by losing an in-conference game after shocking two out of conference teams.
(13) Iowa made things more interesting than it had to be against Arkansas State, but is now 5-0.
(15) Penn State crushed Illinois to bounce back from their loss to Iowa.
(16) Oregon vivisected Washington State (as most teams do) and left them for dead to be eaten by wolves.
(21) Ole Miss had more trouble with Vandy than most thought. They should expect a win next week against Alabama. Welcome to the Houston Nutt Era.
(22) Michigan was completely rocked and dominated by Michigan State for 3 and a half quarters, scored 14 points in the last 4 minutes and then screwed up in overtime. MSU, as this website has maintained, is better than their record. Michigan, as this website has also maintained, has been overrated. So this was not a shock.
(25) Georgia Tech beat a potentially improving Mississippi State team.
The rest of everything:
Maryland survived Clemson. Virginia perplexingly beat UNC. BC nearly screwed the pooch but held on against FSU. Wake dodged NC State. Colorado continues its quest to be bad enough to finally fire Dan Hawkins. K-State blocked an extra point to beat Iowa State. TTech went nuts on New Mexico. Baylor is halfway to a bowl after beating Kent State. Texas A&M forgot to show up against Arkansas. Greg Paulus threw 5 INTs to lead Syracuse to a loss to USF. The Wannstache beat down Louisville. WisCANsin won Paul Bunyan's axe over Minny. Northwestern got a last second TD against Purdue to win. Don't look now but Stanford is 4-1 after beating UCLA. Notre Dame beat Washington in OT but certainly didn't deserve it. Oregon State beat Arizona State. South Carolina beat South Carolina State soundly (and according to the ESPN.com one line summary is "off to best start since 2007". 2007!). Finally, Auburn continues the fun train with a win over the inbreds... I mean Tennessee. Note: As of now, Lane Kiffin has sang "rocky top" "all night long" exactly two times this year out of 5 chances.
Here's your weekly college football rundown for teams that matter in case you missed something here or there:
(1) Florida and (2) beat their respective byes by a total of 639 points. Critics claim they were running up the score.
(3) Alabama had issues at Kentucky in the first half, but scoring 2 TDs in 19 seconds before the half opened that game up very quickly. Kentucky has no QB. At all. 'Bama, on the other hand, looks very strong and very deserving of being a top 5 team.
(4) LSU went between hedges to (18) Georgia and pulled a miracle out of thin air. 3 TDs were exchanged in the last 3 minutes of the game with LSU scoring the last one. You have to wonder if the Tigers were looking ahead to next week's battle with UF. On Georgia's end, their running game clearly has not found a replacement for Knowshon Moreno despite getting their O-line nice and healthy.
(5) Boise State did not meet the expectations everyone had against UC Davis. UC Davis is a D2 school, Boise State is supposedly one of the few true powerhouses in a non BCS conference. Yes, they won and maybe UC Davis is good, but the #5 country in the nation should NEVER have issues with a D2 school even if it is the former D2 national champion. Right, Michigan?
(6) Virginia Tech continues our disappointment trend with their 8 point win against Duke. Yes, a win is nice. But Duke should never come with 20 points of a D1 school. Tyrod Taylor looked miserable and their Defense let up several long plays to white nerdy Duke receivers. That was both funny and a let down for the #6 team.
(7) USC ran over (24) Cal. I guess it didn't matter that Cal lost last week to an Oregon team that was wielding a battle axe and a kite shield. Even if Cal won, USC probably still would have pantsed them at home in front all of their friends and family. Jahvid Best had 47 yards on 13 carries. Not good for the best RB in the nation if you ask me.
Rest of the top 25:
(8) Oklahoma had (17) Miami on the ropes early, but Miami ratcheted up their D and Landry Jones (an awesome name for a QB in the Big XII... with an awesome mustache by the way) couldn't lead the comeback. Da U went 3-1 through their death-run/blood gauntlet which is very much worth a pat on the back, an "attaboy!" and a beer.
(9) Ohio State beat Indiana in unspectacular and boring fashion. The Terrelle Pryor Overrated Watch has been raised from "one eyebrow raised" to "rubbing one's facial hair while taking a deep breath."
At one time (10) Cincy was only up 23-13 to Miami (OH), but they realized their offense wasn't plugged in properly for the first three quarters.
(11) TCU dismantled SMU with no one being surprised.
(12) Houston took on the real markings of a C-USA team by losing an in-conference game after shocking two out of conference teams.
(13) Iowa made things more interesting than it had to be against Arkansas State, but is now 5-0.
(15) Penn State crushed Illinois to bounce back from their loss to Iowa.
(16) Oregon vivisected Washington State (as most teams do) and left them for dead to be eaten by wolves.
(21) Ole Miss had more trouble with Vandy than most thought. They should expect a win next week against Alabama. Welcome to the Houston Nutt Era.
(22) Michigan was completely rocked and dominated by Michigan State for 3 and a half quarters, scored 14 points in the last 4 minutes and then screwed up in overtime. MSU, as this website has maintained, is better than their record. Michigan, as this website has also maintained, has been overrated. So this was not a shock.
(25) Georgia Tech beat a potentially improving Mississippi State team.
The rest of everything:
Maryland survived Clemson. Virginia perplexingly beat UNC. BC nearly screwed the pooch but held on against FSU. Wake dodged NC State. Colorado continues its quest to be bad enough to finally fire Dan Hawkins. K-State blocked an extra point to beat Iowa State. TTech went nuts on New Mexico. Baylor is halfway to a bowl after beating Kent State. Texas A&M forgot to show up against Arkansas. Greg Paulus threw 5 INTs to lead Syracuse to a loss to USF. The Wannstache beat down Louisville. WisCANsin won Paul Bunyan's axe over Minny. Northwestern got a last second TD against Purdue to win. Don't look now but Stanford is 4-1 after beating UCLA. Notre Dame beat Washington in OT but certainly didn't deserve it. Oregon State beat Arizona State. South Carolina beat South Carolina State soundly (and according to the ESPN.com one line summary is "off to best start since 2007". 2007!). Finally, Auburn continues the fun train with a win over the inbreds... I mean Tennessee. Note: As of now, Lane Kiffin has sang "rocky top" "all night long" exactly two times this year out of 5 chances.
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