College Football Year in Review for the Season Starting in '09 and Ending in '10: The Hits, The Misses, and the People That Made Them (Part II)

Posted by Iroquois Plisken

Click here if you missed Part I.

Worst Human Being Alive Strictly Pertaining to College Football - Lane Kiffin. But, you already knew that. Nominations for Worst Human Being Alive Not Strictly Pertaining to College Football are always accepted on a rolling basis.

Worst Makeover - Mark May and his dumb glasses. It's even worse because they are transition lenses. It may help you to know that I do not myself wear glasses, so it is a bit unfair for me to attack him in this regard, but are transition lenses really all that functional? They're at their absolute worst when there's a mid-range of lighting when they look like a partially tinted car window. I would punch people like that in the face, but apparently hitting people in the face while wearing glasses is frowned upon. Pity.

Worst Team - Wazzou! Washington State is a wasteland. About the only thing cool about them is the fact that their alumni have an ongoing challenge to put the Wazzou flag in the background of every College Gameday show. I like how ESPN has become cognizant of it and now actively seeks it out just to keep the streak going and to help them out, but not actually being able to justify a decision to head out that way. That kind of smugness and pretentiousness that ESPN possesses (and in volume) sometimes manifests itself in hilarious ways like that.

Worst Way to Tell Your Boss That You're Going on Vacation - Urban Meyer's "Leave of Absence" that nearly caused everyone in Gainesville's head to a splode.

Worst Omen for a New Head Coach - Tennessee barking (no pun intended) up the same tree that just bit them. Upon the hiring of Derek Dooley (son of former National Champion Buttsniffer HC Vince Dooley) as their new HC, your esteemed author noted that hiring a well-respected (in some circles) coach's son was the same way that Tennessee football got snakebitten the last time. Of course, I doubt this time it will end as poorly, but Derek Dooley may never get a fair shake if the NCAA finds that the University of Tennessee committed recruiting violations under LK.

Worst Week - Wondy Pierre-Louis, former Gators CB. First, his entire family was wiped out in the Haiti quake. Then, they weren't. Then, four felonies allegedly happen. Rough week for Mr. Pierre-Louis. Not to poke fun at an admittedly awful situation, but your author suggests that if Mr. Pierre-Louis' girlfriend would have run a sluggo route, she would have left Wondy in the dust.

And just to chiggity-check myself...

Worst Previous Prediction by Iroquois Plisken - Most of my bowl game predictions. I would have been better off flipping coins this year.


So ends the college football season of analysis. In a couple of weeks (Feb. 3d, precisely), I will bring an analysis of winners and losers on National Signing Day, which should be called National The First Official Day Recruits Can Officially Sign With A School But Really Are Not Bound By Any Sort of Force To Do So But Amazingly Continue in Said Manner for Several Years Day, but that doesn't look good on a t-shirt or on an on-screen ticker.