Slate was right; this is a slow news week, outside of Tiger Woods getting some tail. I do have one thought on his sponsors dropping Tiger like a bad habit: Where in the hell does Accenture find the requisite moral fiber to get rid of Tiger Woods swiftly and painlessly? According to Accenture:
"[G]iven the circumstances of the last two weeks ... the company has determined that [Woods] is no longer the right representative for its advertising."
Please go drink a tall cool bleach cocktail, Accenture. Seriously, whatever each and every one of you are doing, stop doing that and have that bleach cocktail with a side of Early Cuyler's Party Liquor and a heaping helping of cyanide steak. Do you seriously have the high horse to be telling Tiger Woods what to do? You are subsidiaries of Arthur Andersen LLP, who, if you'll recall, orchestrated the Enron, WorldCom, Sunbeam, and Waste Management accounting scandals. I think you've ruined more lives in one of your scandals than Tiger has positively impacted. The very fact that you're dropping a guy for a(n admittedly large) mistake is laughable. Kill yourselves.
That is all. Carry on, citizens.
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