Sometimes coaches need to get a referee's attention. Perhaps the other team is consistently breaking a rule. Perhaps the coach needs to ream an official for missing a call. Perhaps the coach is just lonely.
Saturday night, Les Miles took it to the next level. LSU was caught offsides on defense so many times that Mr. Miles decided to take a new approach. Rather than just do the regular "Your mother is of questionable lineage!" act, Les thought outside the box and proposed marriage.
"If you say yes, I promise not only to be a loving and caring husband, but I will also be a loving and caring father if we should choose to go that route and adopt."Unfortunately for the future Mr. and Mr. Miles, the Bayou region does not take kindly to that kind of marriage. A marriage between a man and another man in southern Louisiana (pronounced "Looseeanna") isn't just frown upon, it is brutally crushed with the force of a 24 hour patrol of airboat patrol men wearing jean shorts wielding sawed off shotguns. The future Miles family could go to Gov. Bobby Jindal, who doubles as an animatronic character at Disney, but a republican can't be can't be soft on gay issues of any kind (not even mouth to penis resuscitation!).
We regret to be the bearer of bad news to Les Miles and the future Mr. Les Miles, but sometimes politely pointing out such matters is better than seeing them fight the thing to the bitter end. This may become a civil partnership unless Les takes the job as the next coach of the Vermont Catamounts football team who would probably take him with open arms.
We regret to be the bearer of bad news to Les Miles and the future Mr. Les Miles, but sometimes politely pointing out such matters is better than seeing them fight the thing to the bitter end. This may become a civil partnership unless Les takes the job as the next coach of the Vermont Catamounts football team who would probably take him with open arms.
No comments:
Post a Comment